The Science of Gratitude

 

There is no joy without gratitude

Brene Brown

As we come to the end of an incredibely difficult year it feels really hard to look back with anything remotely close to gratitude.  The losses we all experienced and continue to experience are hard to accept and many of us are currently experiencing fatigue, low mood and significant episodes of anxiety. 

When we are in the midst of a global pandemic, that seems to be getting progressively worse rather than better, turning our attention to the things we are grateful for is hard. And yet this is probably one of the most important things we can do in terms of our wellbeing. Dr Robert Emmons who is a leading gratitude researcher says “crisis can make us more grateful and gratitude can also help us to cope with crisis.  Consciously cultivating an attitude of gratitude builds up a sort of psychological immune system that can cushion us when we fall”. 

Our brains are wired with something called a negativity bias; this essentially means that we are all incredibely good at spotting the negative things in our lives but not so great at spotting the positives.  You all know the scenario, you have five interactions in one day, four of them positive and one of them not so much.  Sitting on your sofa that evening which interaction is your mind showing up with - Yup that’s right… the one that didn’t go very well.  This negativity bias is hard wired and with good reason.  Our ancestors needed to be able to spot the threats in their environments in order to survive.  The cavemen who allowed their attention to focus on the beautiful tree instead of the sabre-toothed tiger lurking in the grass didn’t make it very far!

So, if we know that our brains are hard wired for negativity where does this leave us, especially in the middle of a global pandemic? This is where it gets really exciting. Our amazing wonderous brains are changing all the time depending on the experiences we expose them to.  David Eagleman, a renowned neuroscientist from Stanford University, calls this ability live wiring. He writes “our machinery isn’t fully preprogrammed, but instead shapes itself by interacting with the world, you are a different person than you were this time last year, because the gargantuan tapestry of your brain has woven itself into something new”.  This is really significant because it is telling us that our brain is constantly changing in response to how we are spending our time.   And amazingly we have, in our agency, the ability to model and change the very structures of our brain. 

What this means is that although our brain is wired through evolution for negativity, we can actually change and strengthen our brains in remarkably positive ways.  By adopting a conscious practice of gratitude (rather than an attitude of gratitude) the benefits to our wellbeing are remarkable. 

Gratitude...

·       Improves general wellbeing

·       Increases resilience

·       Reduces stress and low mood

·       Improves our relationships

And if all if this isn’t enough the research also tells us that gratitude will improve our immune system, lower our blood pressure and brings us more restful and restorative sleep. 

So how can we tap into these benefits?

A practice of gratitude essentially means noticing the good stuff in the world.  This doesn’t mean we ignore the tough stuff we all experience in our lives from time to time.  It just means increasing our focus on the good stuff even in the midst of some really tough stuff. 

There are lots of different ways to develop this practice but what’s important to remember is that gratitude builds gratitude – our brain changes with experience and the more we consciously practice gratitude the more our brain will start to automatically practice gratitude.

Now remember our brain is not very good at noticing the good stuff and even when it does it doesn’t tend to stick around for very long.  So whatever practice we adopt it needs to allow us to firstly notice the positive stuff and secondly give us a means of holding onto it for long enough to create positive structural changes in the brain. 

Here are some simple ideas…

Three things for 21 days

According to Harvard researcher Shawn Achor, if we write down three things we are grateful for and continue to do this for 21 days this will train our brain to change the way it perceives the world.  Structuring our brain to scan for the positive lovely stuff that we often don’t even register.  It’s that simple!!  

But it is worth remembering that in order to keep your brain engaged in the process, because we know our brains love novelty, it’s important to keep your entries novel and specific.  So instead of writing “I am grateful for my health” try “I am grateful for my healthy body that allowed me to walk 3km this morning”.

Write about a positive experience

Take time to recall something positive that happened and write down absolutely everything you can remember about the experience.  By recalling in detail something positive your brain recognises it as meaningful and creates a stronger memory.  And because your brain can’t tell the difference between something that is actually happening and a detailed visual recall of the event you get to experience the lovely feel good feeling a second time.

Teatime gratitude ritual

A simple way to introduce this within families is creating a space after dinner or before bed when everyone has the opportunity to name a few things they are grateful for that day.  In my family it’s generally things like, the ice cream on the way home from school, a homework free evening or maybe something funny the dog did that day.  It doesn’t need to be complicated it just needs to be meaningful to that individual.   

Lastly…

We could all do with a little bit more positivity, especially now.  Practising gratitude and encouraging our children to practice gratitude will not take away the current losses and threats but what it will do is allow us to make a little bit more room for all those small wonderful things that we may be failing to notice.