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Before You Post: What Every Parent Should Know About "Sharenting"

 



Have you ever heard of the term “sharenting”? It was first popularised in a 2010 article by The Wall Street Journal, and combines “sharing” and “parenting” to describe the growing trend of posting content about our kids online—mainly on social media.

Over the past couple of years, I have spoken with several young people who were struggling with what their parents were sharing online. They felt embarrassed and frustrated that personal moments from their childhood and early adolescence were posted without their consent and this experience is not unique. Increasingly, young people are expressing discomfort with “sharenting,” and while it is usually well-intentioned, this practice raises important questions about privacy, autonomy, and emotional wellbeing.

As parents, we share for a variety of reasons. Many of us post to stay connected with family, to document memories, or to seek support from online communities. For some, it’s a way to feel seen and validated in the challenges of parenting. Occasionally, there is a financial motive, where families monetize their children’s presence online through brand partnerships or affiliate marketing.

While the research in this area is still emerging, we’re beginning to understand more about the long-term impact of putting our kids on social media—especially once they reach adolescence.   This age group is at a critical stage of developing identity and independence, and several key concerns have emerged.

Teenagers need control over their image—online and offline. Part of adolescence is about shaping their own identity. When we post about them without their explicit consent, we can unintentionally undermine this process.

The narratives we craft about our children play a significant role in shaping their self-perception. When we label them with descriptors like "sporty," "clumsy," or "clever," they often internalize these labels, which can unconsciously guide their behaviour to align with these expectations. While such labelling might seem harmless or even positive, it can become problematic, particularly during adolescence. At this stage, teenagers are actively forming their identities and seeking autonomy. If their online persona—largely curated by parents through earlier posts and labels—doesn't resonate with their evolving self-concept, it can lead to feelings of dissonance and frustration.

Sharenting can erode trust. As our children grow, our role shifts from manager to coach.  To be a good coach we need a good relationship with our teen.   Sharing content without consent damages trust and ultimately damages our relationship with our teen at a critical stage in their development

Peer and social consequences are real. Teenagers are deeply aware of how they are perceived by their peers. When we share content—even from years earlier— this can lead to embarrassment, teasing, or even bullying.

When we share too much, especially personal information like full names, birthdates, or school details, we may also be exposing our children to identity theft and data misuse. Hackers can collect and combine these details to commit fraud, sometimes years later. Additionally, tech companies often track this data and begin building digital profiles of our kids long before they understand what privacy means.

So, do we need to stop sharing completely? Not necessarily—but we do need to be more mindful. It's about finding a balance between sharing meaningful moments and protecting our children's wellbeing online.

Here are a few simple, research-backed ways to “sharent” more responsibly:

Always ask for consent - Especially from older children.

Protect personal information—Avoid sharing full names, birthdates, schools, or visible locations.

Limit your audience—Use private or restricted accounts instead of public profiles.

Think long-term—Ask yourself, “Will my child be okay with this post in 5 or 10 years?”

Set family rules—Agree on what is okay to share and what should stay private.

By making more intentional choices, we can still celebrate our children while protecting their online footprint.

 

 

 

 


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